Gag Answers from Who Wants to Be a Millionaire

Well, my first day back from vacation, and it seems that Pat Robertson is shooting off his mouth again.

But I really don't care to give him any more attention than I have to, so instead I'm going to write about something a lot more fun. One of my favorite parts of watching Who Wants to Be a Millionaire is hearing the often-hilarious "D" answers to early-level questions in the game. Here is a list of ten such questions with their humorous wrong answers. (Real answers, just in case you need them, are provided in parentheses afterward.)

1. An egg hunt is an activity that usually takes place on what holiday?

D. Salmonella Awareness Day (Real Answer: Easter)


2. A student who is described as a "Clock Watcher" is usually eagerly waiting for what?

   D. An all-new "60 Minutes" (Real Answer: The end of class)

3. A common piece of advice warns you to "be careful what you wish for because" what?

   D. Dude, she's your cousin (Real Answer: You might get it)

4. A school district is typically run by an administrator with what title?

   D. Joe Mama (Real Answer: Principal)

5. According to a popular religious saying, "The Lord giveth, and the Lord" what?

   D. Maketh up verbs (Real Answer: Taketh away)

6. On a traditional clock face, when both the hour and minute hands both point straight up, what time is it?

   D. Hammer time (Real Answer: 12 o'clock)

7. According to traditional etiquette, a woman should respond to a man's bow with what polite gesture?

   D. Fist pump (Real Answer: Curtsy)

8. By definition, which of these terms refers to a person with whom someone once had a passionate relationship?

   D. Old Navy stockboy (Real Answer: Old Flame)

9. Which of these organizations is considered one of our country's "armed forces"?

   D. U.S. Kmart shoppers (Real Answer: U.S. Marines)

10. According to Emily Post, children should not leave the dinner table until asking "May I please be" what?

    D. Legally emancipated (Real Answer: Excused)